In Which Weariness Wins

23 February 2004

Main task for today: not walking into walls. I am tired. I'm not sure why it was so particularly bad this time around -- 5:00 is not that much earlier than I usually get up, not that much earlier than I've gotten up in the past. It's not in the fours. In fact, when I've gotten up at 4:whatever, I've felt much, much worse than I do now. Right now I just feel...confused. I've discovered that the thing that gets most messed up when I'm this amount of tired is my suspension of disbelief. Usual things seem faintly incredible, and out-of-the-ordinary things seem reasonable.

Also, my fingers are slightly too heavy.

Yesterday kind of slipped away from me, a bit at a time, but generally in a pleasant way. I called to make a quick check on Michelle and ended up talking for an hour and a half. That sort of thing. So I once again finished approximately nothing. Just middles, middles, middles.

Today we're supposed to have someone out to look at the stove, but they've canceled so many times over the last two months that I don't know if I believe in them. (But I won't say I don't, lest they turn out to be like ninjas and fairies.) Other than that...I drove safely back from the airport, but I'm not sure how much other driving I should do. I can maybe go to the library and the grocery store tomorrow.

I have the feeling next weekend will involve a fair amount of buying expensive stuff. Office chair stuff. Water softener stuff. Just...stuff. Stuff we need to just set aside time and get. It's also time to get at least one more bookshelf (which we've known we needed since late October). Maybe next time I go to Target. Maybe tomorrow. But not today. I have also discovered that my feet are lighter than they ought to be, proportionate to the rest of my body. Upper extremities too heavy, lower too light. Maybe I should walk around the house on my hands. Oooooor perhaps not. So very tired.

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